"NEVER ARGUE WITH A CHILD"
>
> A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher
said
it
> was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even
though
> it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl
stated
> that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher
reiterated
that
> a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The
little
> girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher
asked,
"What
> if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
> ______________________________________________________
>
> A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while
they
> drew. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As
she
> got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the

> drawi! ng was? The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher
paused
and
> said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat,
or
> looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a
minute."
> ___________________________________________
>
> The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to
> persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think
how
nice
> it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's
> Jennifer; she's a lawyer,' or 'that's Michael. He's a doctor.'" A
small
> voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher.
She's
> dead."
> _________________________________________
>
> A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying
to
> make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my
head,
the
> blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn! red in the
face."
> "Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing
upright
in
> the ordinary positions the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little
fellow
> shouted, "Because your feet aren't empty."
> ______________________________________________________
>
> The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary
school
> for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The
nun
made
> a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is
watching."
> Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table
was a
> large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A CHILD had written a note,
"Take
all
> You want. God is watching the apples."